We argued…argued

arguments wanting to be civil.

Take breaks, smoke a cigarette together afraid

illuding time trying to fall it apart

unconflicted now more conflicted -

still very stuck

attempting to make duality make a

lock for us to stick to,

People know. People don’t know. Do I – surely something but not enough, never enough. There has been an abundance of question, since becoming a Jew apart from the Jew I used to think I was, in between Israel, a country that after living through the Arava Institute of Environmental Studies (AIES) I cannot even call by its name – Israel – with out guilt assuming a place among the crevices of those questions, comes the word Palestine now, in between that place and the United States…

My first experience of the Palestinian occupation was in the fifth or sixth grade. I grew up in Dubai, in the United Arab Emirates, where politics wasn’t such a huge part of everyday life. My parents, though incredibly active politically in their youth, did everything possible to shield me and my brother from politics as children. I would always want to watch the news with them but they wouldn’t let me…

I am a child of unknown descent.

Innocent

of the condescending fashion

that you be asking me

questioning me

wondering ’bout my ethnicity,

making me aware…

There are many terrible answers to the question “where do you stand,” and the worst I can ever remember giving was “in Jerusalem.” Jerusalem? I’ve heard of that place before. An imaginary place. It lies directly between the edge of reality and the end of time. It lies at the centre of the universe. How strange to end up so far away. I’d just gotten off the bus from somewhere that seemed a lot closer.

They’ve sipped on all the fine Galilee wine
And feasted on Palestine’s finest veal
And now that they’ve finally gobbled it up all – whole
They decided to feed Gaza to the sea
PLO now liberates from high mantles and hotel suites

It was about a year ago that we, both Canadian medical students at the University of Montréal, decided to venture out into the world of the Palestinian-Israeli conflict. One of us, Ramzy W. is a Canadian born Palestinian Christian, and the other, Mahli B. is a French Quebecer. Our vision was simple: spend one summer volunteering in Palestine, give of ourselves what we can and absorb as much as we can about this part of the world. This small step turned into many and on June 7, 2005 we were both in the air on our way to somewhat uncharted territories that left a lasting mark on our lives.

To me, the point of our prayers

is that they may reach Israel

through sound waves

like a wave, a wave of energy

blessing it thoroughly

and as I walked out from the subway

and through the door…

This is my third visit to Israel, but this time is different. This time I want to get down to the bottom of things and to understand the political situation to the best of my ability. I am seeking the truth, but as I seek truth in a country that constantly shifts and is run by people with opposing ideologies, I find that my perspective changes on a daily basis. I have a deep love for Israel, but I know she is imperfect. Therefore, I am striving to make peace with that contradiction…

Eight years ago I dropped out of school and went to Israel to experience the magic of the Jewish homeland, my Jewish homeland. Things didn’t progress as smoothly as I expected. I got kicked out of my Kibbutz and wound up working as a dishwasher and a line cook in an upscale restaurant in Tel Aviv. But I was young and adaptable…